mixed feelings

today is a momentous day in a few different ways.

today, may 15, 2012 the lutheran school of theology at chicago's board of directors voted for lstc to become a reconciling in christ seminary, joining in the proclamation of the gospel with sister seminaries plts and ltsp, and many congregations, synods, and other organizations and colleges.  how exciting it is to be part of this process and to be part of a community that is committed not only to wanting diverse people of all sexual orientations and gender identities at lstc, but that is also committed to talking about our differences and engaging with each other so that we might all recognize each other as the beloved children of god that we are.

i am so excited that this process, which involved a lot of congregation has so wonderfully set the stage for a proclamation that calls us to continue and really get down to the messy business that is being church differently together.  i am also grateful for the huge amounts of support and leadership from so many people at lstc: students, staff, faculty, alum, and board members.  it has been a long journey so far and it is just beginning :)

at the same time, today was the last day that i will see gerry, jackie, and addie working together in the cafeteria.  after my last lunch, i dawdled, taking pictures, hugging, and trying to say good-bye in a way that was authentic to our experiences of working and being in community together.  leaving the cafeteria today was sad and i will deeply miss what it has been for me over the last two years.

i am also leaving today on the train to see my grandmother for what will likely be the last time on this side of death.  she is 91 years old and approaching the eleventh anniversary of granddaddy's death.  every time we would visit granny, she would take me to church with her and i would get so excited to go to mass with her and the coffee girls and then afterwards to go for coffee and pastries and to talk.  these women nurtured me in the faith in a way that i can never forget.

so, as i begin the long journey east to connecticut, i go hoping and praying that i am able to see granny one more time and that i am able to be present with her and simply love her.  she has journeyed a long and difficult road and in the last few weeks i have realized how little is left.  through it all, though, she has been my granny and i love her.